Intensity Redefined

I have been described by many to have an intense personality. I can't help it really- it's just how I function. I tend to take things pretty seriously, and can often get a bit dramatic. This intensity easily shines through my last few posts, and as I read over them again, part of me wants to apologize for my incessant ranting. I'm sure that some have given up reading this blog- tired of reading my long soliloquies on God's heart for the poor. Some are saying, "Beth, dear, we get it. God loves the poor, so should we. Please move onto something else and be a bit more interesting."

If I am honest, there are indeed times when I am tempted to use this blog to prove the world how funny I really am, or how clever I can be with words, or even how much I love Jesus. In these moments, I find God catching me with His grace, gently reminding me that I am not the one deserving any glory- and that He will not give it to another (Isaiah 42:8). He wants glory all for Himself, and He will do what He must in my life in order that I be humbled before Him.

Lately, God has been bringing me low in the presence of giants gone before, specifically through reading A Chance to Die, The Life and Legacy of Amy Carmichael (missionary to orphans in India at the turn of the twentieth century). If I am one labeled by the world as "intense," I am not sure the world has language enough to describe the life of this woman, for my intensity pales to almost invisibility in comparison to hers. Some of my favorite quotes thus far-

"Her great longing was to have a 'single eye' for the glory of God. Whatever might blur the vision God had given her of His work, whatever could distract or deceive or tempt others to seek anything but the Lord Jesus Himself she tried to eliminate."

"Missionary social activities were not Amy's cup of tea. How to justify the time spent in this way? It was like making daisy chains while people were plunging blindly over a precipice."

"If there were less of what seems like ease in our lives they would tell more for Christ and souls...We profess to be strangers and pilgrims, seeking after a country of our own, yet we settle down in the most un-stranger-like fashion, exactly as if we were quite at home and meant to stay as long as we could."

After reading Amy, I feel like God has given me a new definition of what it means to live with intensity for Him and His glory (and I'm only halfway through). I would wholeheartedly recommend her for those of you getting bored with me. Be warned, however- her fiery fanaticism, earnest energy, and deadly devotion to Jesus may challenge your own understanding of the intensity with which we are called, and even dared, to follow after God.